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circle jerk

have you ever been in a circle jerk? how many people? did you jerk off yourself, or was it where you do the person to the left or right? was there a contest involved? clothes or no clothes?

Hey man, I have only done it one time. I really liked it! Wish I could do it again We jacked each other off and were totally nude. It wasn't really a contest but more for just fun, we were all horny and just thought it would be fun and trust me it was just awesome because there was no need to be ashamed or anything because we were all guys and there was nothing that was going to happen that the the others don't do so that made it even more fun.

I have been in a circle jerk before and I thought it was cool. It was with one of my best friends and we stated off watching a porn movie and my buddy decided we could get each other off. It was really strange at first, but then it turned out pretty good. We were both nude. We jacked each other off and then gave each other BJ's. He is married and I am about to be married. Neither one of us is gay. We just decided that we would do it every once in a while to have something different. I can't wait to do it again. I would like to get together with more of my buddies and do it. I just do not know how to get it started. Any idea's anybody???

also i'm not trying to gay-bash anyone but lets look at it from a straight guy's point of view. you had oral sex (BJ) with a guy (sorry thats gay). you're about to be married (cheating) and u gave each other hand jobs (cheating again and still makes you gay) does your wife know you're doing this? i bet she doesn't. and if she does well. more power to her for putting up with someone that cheats let your parents know that you've had oral sex and j/o'd another guy. see if they don't call you gay. look in the mirror and face the fact you are gay/bi whatever. and yes your friend is also gay. i mean come on. you both were naked! gave each other bj's and j/o'd each other! if you find this offensive which i'm pretty sure you will. it just proves my point that ur gay. and just to make it clear i have gay female and guy friends. so don't try to say i hate gay people. and also the only circle jerkin i do is with my own hand or that of a female

yes i have been in a couple of circle jerks. Once there was 3 guys, and the other time there was 4. We started off just jerking ourselves, and then we decided to jerk each other. No contest involved and the other guys were "straight" and no one knew that i was gay at the time. Clothes came off eventually.

yes . last night stayed over my friends house there was 4 of us we start talking you normal guy talk about girls and stuff next thing you know my friend says you want watch a porn of course we all said yea . i had a boner in seconds so we were watching then this kid says man i need to jerk off so then went to get something and comes back with lotion . and says you guys in .i was like what do you mean . do guys want have a jerk seastion so we all look at each other and said all right . then he said how about we jerk each other at the same time and who ever cums last . has to taste their cum. so he starts taking all his clothes off so then we all took ours off . so we all sit down and jerk each other off .

welshterier you said you did this before . what happened at yours clothes or not . any contest . mine was a first it was crazy but fun !

more like a straight line - no clothes no contest - 2 at one time left and right

I always daydreamed of doing it, but never had the opportunity.

circle jerks were pretty common in college. there would be as many as 8 or 9 guys at a time. we would set up contests like sitting in a circle with a target in the middle to see who could hit it or shoot the closest to it. we would also see who could shoot first or who could hold out the longest and shoot last. winners always always got a prize and the loser...well not so lucky. other times we would get going just because we were bored and had nothing better to do. there was a real sense of male bonding during the circle jerks. we were usually naked and sometime we would get into jerking each other off. i still enjoy doing this with some of my guy friends even today

nature, what was the prize, and what do you mean "the loser...well not so lucky". what would happen to the last guy?

Natureboi,

So how does this happen with your guy friends today? I have a few close male friends but none that I would be comfortable enough with to say lets do a circle jerk or just jerk off together.

Well reader,

first off, i am still close with some of my old college buddies and we see each other on a regular basis. the circle jerk usually starts after we've been hanging out for awhile and everyone is feeling relaxed. we get together alot to play/watch sports, have cookouts, help each other with home projects, etc. then before you know it someone starts talking about how horny he is and the topic of conversation leads to needing to relaese or else someone in the group brings up the subject (no pun intended) and one thing leads to another. sometime we get started over a lost bet or dare. we're a very tight bunch of guys, including the friends i've made since college. several of us go to the same gym so we see each other naked on a regular basis. other than that reader i can't explain how it happens it just does. i also have to admit that sometime we have a few drinks in us in order to get things started but not all the time. hope this helps.

I have been in circle jerks where my dad and some of his poker buddies would take a night off from cards and watch porn. We just masterbated ourselves except one time I seen one of dads buddies and dad docking with dad having the foreskin. I thought that was cool. Another time a coworker and I was at his house for a bbq and after everybody left he invited me to stay and watch some porn. We masterbated by ourselves, each other and docked with him having the foreskin what a night that was

I'm sorry, but what do you mean by docked and having the foreskin?

Thanks for the info Natureboi,

Can't really help, but I am jealous that you can do this with your buddies. We moved to the area we are in about 4 years ago. It's not an overly friendly neighborhood and on top of that there are only 1 possibly 2 guys I would even want to jerk off with or see naked.

R

docking is when two guys are dick to dick and they slide their foreskin(s) over each other's dick.

I had asked what docking was in another post and to tell the truth I can't picture this. But I have never seen a guy with a foreskin. The only guys I have seen have been cut.

R

A foreskin is the softest skin on a human body. Sliding it over someone else's glans, or having someone else's slide over your glans, is like a pair of lips, but smoother and softer. It is like a kiss using the genitals.

sorry dude, i just realized you had posted. the loser usually had to grant some type of favors to the winner(s) or we would come up with other ideas. for example one time the loser had to run around outside naked in a snowstorm. we would get pretty creative with the things we did.

Sometimes my two buddies Brian and Tom, when we're bored we decide to pull down our pants and have a circle jerk party! We sit there quietly and stare directly into each others eyes. Our favorite technique is The tornado. We just jack off in our favourite way using whatever techniques we want. Then when you feel you about to ejaculate, grab the bottom of you penis and start whirling it around in circles. That way when you finally do ejaculate, the centripetal force will cause you to cum all over the place. It gets real messy sometimes. For best results we save up your semen for a couple of days, and prolong the session as long as possible so that you have a lot more jizz and shoot more forcefully. I look forward to the weekends with Brian and Tom.

getting around the truth! and the eay way, We got cake lets eat it!!! .

Just in case you were wondering this is homosexual behavior. Not that there is anything wrong with being gay. But in case you were wondering if you were. Participating in a circle jerk pretty much confirms it.

I agree that it is homo/bi-sexual behavior, especially if you're masturbating each other...fits the definition pretty well, same gender sexual contact.

however, i have the desire to try such a thing, or to try something with even just 1 guy, but i'm in no way attracted to men in general...I think it's a primal urge or something.

I'm in my mid fifties, and I've never figured out sexuality, and sexual desire. I never participated in anything like this, but it attracts me. I'm totally straight, but think men are attractive. I've only been with one woman my whole life, and have no desire to have sex with anyone else, but if I did, it would likely be a guy. Some people just don't fit into the average sexual archetypes.

alternate viewpoint: i'm gay and have never done the circlejerk thing, never really had any desire to, nor does it seem very exciting/erotic to me.

so i don't know how you'd fit that into the various definitions and pronouncements, but it might indicate that some of the definitions commonly used are way too narrow.

GuardSquealer, I think guys could have participated in this in their teens and college years and be straight. Having said that, most studies show few men are totally straight. There is likely a little "Bi" or "gay" in all men. Many men have never acted on their sexual feelings, but have been curious and wondered what it would be like. Personally, i think society would be better off if we all were bi-sexual. I bet there would be less wars.

Well I have think I have a fairly open mind, and have never found another man attractive in any sexual way what so ever. Have no desire to touch another man's penis and find nothing erotic about doing so or having another man touch mine. And if your gay that is fine with me. I think this phenomonon is a result of the shifting of what society finds acceptable.

I completely disagree. I think this has nothing to do with any shifting of what society finds acceptable. I think if you take a look at monkeys in the zoo, or bonobos (chimp relatives who are closely related to humans), they all participate in sexual acts which are all over the map, and do it frequently. People have always been doing this stuff. They have been discreet, only when society gets upset. Think of Julius Caesar, who was called every woman's husband, and every man's wife. With the advent of anonymity over the network, people are more willing to talk about what they do, more than they would if they were discussing it over the fence with their neighbor, who would tell the next guy, etc. Straight guys who are inclined to circle jerk are more willing to express it, anonymously. Straight guys who are not inclined, like yourself, see a shifting landscape, but that is because more is being held up to the light of day, not because the landscape is shifting. Again, there are all kinds of degrees here. There are men who enjoy seeing another guy jerk, there are men who enjoy jerking with another guy, but who would never want to touch, the guy who wants to reach over, etc. As you can see from within your own heart, and John's post, it is not a simple, straight or gay issue. John is gay, and it has no appeal for him. You are straight, and it has no appeal for you. It is more like anal orientation. 20% of people are anally oriented, no matter if they are straight, gay, bi, or lesbian. This desire to jerk with company seems to cut across sexual orientations the same way. Just like the guy who wants to be mounted by his wife is still straight, though probably unlike your style of straightness, these guys self-identify as straight, and are not necessarily kidding themselves, or closet cases. Human sexuality is fascinatingly complex.

Yea, I think we are going to have to agree to disagree on this one. Personally I would take war over participating in a circle jerk.

Seriously, GuardSquealer! You would rather risk your life and the life of others than jerk off another guy? That is very telling. I haven't touched someone else's penis since I was 14 or 15, which is many years ago, and I am a veteran. I'd touch a 100 before I would want to go back to battle.

Gary,

Most folks that have never been to combat or have never even served in the Armed Forces probably think the same what Guard Squealer does.

I can almost guarantee that if he had, he'd be saying something different.

Rman

i'm a vet as well...never been near the front lines at all thank god, but i did go to iraq for a few months. even though i've never seen 1st hand the perils of war, i can fully say i'd much rather touch a penis than have war!

what a statement to have to say, ha!

My apologies to all the Vets that read that. I did not mean to offend any veteran and by no means trivialize your service to our country. That comment was in response to another earlier comment. I personally would like to thank any and all veterans that have served our country. Thank you.

I have never been in a cicle jerk but would love to try it. But I have been jacked off by onther man and it was great.

At ease, GuardSquealer. You are among friends, and can say what you like. Nobody took offense, they were just noting that they felt differently.

Woodsman it is fun. You should get together with some of your buddies and give it a try.

I did read above and I do not think it makes you gay to do this. I do not want to have sex with a man, but there is something about it. It is kind of erotic. I think it is just another for of masturbation. All guys do that anyway.

It is a sad state of affairs when you will so it does not make you gay to jack off another guy or be jacked off by another guy or to give a BJ or Recieve one from another male. Look up homosexual that is the definition and there fore it makes you gay. I don't have a problem with someone being gay, but just admit that you are gay. If you are jacking off other guys, getting jacked off by other guys, oral sex with other guys. Flat out gay. Sitting in the sauna jacking off with another guy.... Gay... Gay.... Gay.... Tell your wifes dad you gave another guy a BJ and see if he thinks your gay. Tell your own dad, see if he thinks your gay.... Look in the mirror... Tell your self your not gay... That is the only person that is going to think that except maybe the dudes you are jerking off with....

I have never had oral or anything eles just a hand job. Does this mean I am gay? What ever happened to the term Bi ?

Hey! Guard S - we are all going to begin wondering "why thou protesteth so much"... just kidding. In my years of working with lots of guys I have become convinced that men are mostly bi-sexual and more opportunistic than not. Obviously there are gradations in this from virtually exclusively one way or another to many shades of in-between. More harm is done by insisting a person can only be ONE way or another than you may realize. So maybe it is time to let this subject go. You say you are not judge mental on the topic - but I have to tell you - your words come out differently. Let's just let this one rest and move on to really supporting each other. Life is hard enough.

I have to agree with GAP1954. I think most men are bi-sexual. I do not want to have major sex with a guy, but I kind of thought it was neat to just play around with my friend. I do not think of myself as being flat out gay. I never had any attraction to a guy. I just like the rush I got from it. I am really in love with my soon-to-be-wife. She is really wonderful.

I'm posting just to remind everyone that we do have a couple of sex discussion boards you may want to use to continue to explore this topic:

Sexuality: Friends Talking

Sexual Issues: Member to Member

I just find it amusing that someone will say I am not gay, but my buddy and I gave each other hand tuggies and blow jobs. Where I come from that's gay. I am not trying to offend anyone, just pointing out the obvious. Maybe someone forgot to point that out to some of these guys. Maybe the lack of a good male role model has created an enviroment where no one points these things out. You can try to disguise it by saying your bisexual, but personally I think the bisexual thing works alot better for a woman than a man. And yes there is a huge difference between a man being bisexual and a woman being bisexual. And I believe that if you are gay you are born gay. But, Like I said tell your wife's dad or your fiance's dad you blew a guy and see if he just say's "oh that's just normal guy behavior". And as far as that goes tell your wife or fiance you blew a dude and see what they say. I just think this discussion should have been posted on the Gay and Lesbian board and not the Man to Man board. Because there is nothing manly about jerking or blowing your buddy......

You have some obvious hangups, GuardSquealer. You also have some valid points.

A hangup:

Are you for real, when you say being bisexual works a lot better for a woman than a man? Just because you feel bisexuality is OK for a woman, and you feel it is repulsive for a man, doesn't mean it isn't the exact same thing, except with the genders reversed.

A valid point:

Telling your dad, or father in law, that you blew another guy, but are not gay. Old school guys are less likely to be understanding, and more likely to judge in absolutes.

I think you are defensive about feelings of attraction between men.

If you look in Craig's list, there are plenty of opportunistic straight men, who want a totally uninhibited bj from a gay guy. If he's straight 99% of the time, and just wants something strange done in total submission by another guy 1% of the time, is he gay? There are many more men who are like this, than you and I would like to admit. The gay guys don't mistake them for gay, or bi. They don't generally like to kiss, They just want to unload and go.

In the Large Penis Support Group, many men who self-identify as gay, straight, or bi find the idea of rubbing penises with another guy extremely hot.

What if I had a circle jerk with a guy 40 years ago, and really enjoyed it? Then, I went on to fall in love, marry, and have 5 kids, and never have another experience with a guy, or even thought of it again, Am I gay? Am I bi? Or am I straight, with one old experience in the other direction?

The whole thing is a lot grayer than you might like it to be. There is a lot of truth in the old joke, "What's the difference between a straight guy, and a gay guy? About 6 beers"

I really don't think I have any hang ups at all about this. It is what it is. I doubt if there were as many circle jerks 40 years ago. But whatever. I don't really care, just find it amusing.

I couldn't agree more. If you're a guy and you have any sexual encounter with a guy more than once (to experiment once is normal behavior for all men), then you're gay or bisexual--there really is no way around it. I'm gay, myself, and I meet many men who are in complete denial about their sexual identity, and because of this they are usually confused, miserable, and more likely to put themselves in compromising circumstances (risky sexual situations, etc). It's much healthier to accept the fact that you are indeed gay or bisexual than to live in denial. There's nothing wrong with being either gay or bisexual. Lots of people are gay and bisexual, and the more accepting you are of yourself, the happier you will be. My intention is not to start a flame war or make anyone feel badly, I just want to clarify the situation.

Consider:

I'm gay, always have been, always will be.

But by the above definitions, "more than one" experience with a woman would make me straight? Been there, done that (a number of times). It doesn't change a thing.

Come on guys, this is absurd. Get the heck over it. There are FAR more important things in the world, and far more important things in every person's relations with sexual partners or what ever you want to call them.

There have been circle jerks since the world was young. Ever read anything about sex in Greece or Rome? The big difference between then and now, is that they didn't post their experiences anonymously on the internet. Now, we see more of what has always been going on. In the dark ages, when Playgirl came out, my dad told me he had seen one. He said, "All the dicks are going the wrong way", indicating flaccid. He had 7 kids, and never had sex with a guy, at least as an adult. He asked me one time what a homosexual was. "Is that when a guy blows another guy?" Being gay doesn't necessarily mean you are automatically open minded about sex. What is the big investment in labels, anyway? If it means so little to people, I wonder why people feel compelled to post, and be judgmental? John, that was an interesting post. The gayest man I know, a relative, has had sex with 8 to 10 times the number of women I have had, and most of the women were serious, jawdropping beauties.

This is definetly homosexual/bi sexual behavior. Doesn't matter how u look at it, or how comfortable you were... when your sitting around with a bunch of guys jerking eachother off something else is going on. NO MATTER how straight you claim to be.

Your right. No way you justify it and say your not gay.

OK. I'm a homo, who has only dated one woman, been in a monogamous relationship with a woman for 36 years, and had 3 kids. It might surprise my wife, and even me, but if you guys say it, it must be so... no getting around it.

Well first of all, I have never called anyone on here a name like homo. So if you want to call yourself one that is on you. I am not saying that if you touched another guys penis that means your gay. It is an homosexual act. If you did it once and you were to say ahhh not really what I am in to, then fine you experimented a little, and it wasn't your thing.

However if you did it once, and you can't wait to try it again, well then that is a little different. If you did it and wound up giving the dude a BJ then that is a whole other story. I don't think anyone can blow another man and not say they are gay. Just my opinion. There are many gays leading a straight lifestyle. Married to women and just affraid to admit the truth.

I have said it a dozen times nothing wrong with being gay. But no one can say it is normal male behavior to masturbate other guys, and perform oral sex on them. The ones that are saying it just don't want to admit the truth.

Oh and I have drank six beers or more many times and still have never jacked off or blew another guy.

Be careful about using the word 'normal' in this context; it implies any behavior outside what you deem as normal to be 'abnormal'. And I hope that's not your intent.

I'm not sure why definitions are so important, nor why it's up to anyone outside ourselves to define who we are.

It has become accepted by most experts that sexuality is a continuum, that a few are all heterosexual or homosexual, but most lie somewhere in between.

To anyone who believes this discussion shouldn't continue or that certain viewpoints should be removed... this board is a man-to-man board, not a gay-to-gay or bi-to-bi board or hetero-to-hetero board. That means that differing opinions are welcome here as long as they are shared respectfully. Disagreement is fine; just continue to keep it civil.

I can understand that this discussion could be uncomfortable and/or even hurtful to some. It can die down if people stop posting to it.

I'm still not sure how this thread devolved to the current state of affairs. It really seems like such an inconsequential matter; the behavior cited is probably a one-time thing for those who ever did it, and a never thing for the majority who have not participated. It's not like it is something that is going to affect your whole life and all the relationships forever.

If it happened, it did; if it didn't happen, then it didn't. Get over it. It's just not--or it shouldn't be--that big a problem for anyone. If it is, then those folks need to look inside themselves, look at their fears and obsessions, not cast broad aspersions on those who had this happen once, probably 20-30 years ago.

Frankly the whole activity sounds silly and sort of pointless to me, just a waste of time. But wasting this much energy on such a minor matter is an even bigger waste.

I blew the other guy.

Am I gay?

He blew me.

Is he gay?

We attempted anal sex. We rubbed penises. We never did it again.

He's been married for 45 years. I've been married for 35. I've never had sex with another guy, and neither has he.

Am I waiting to go gay? Maybe you know more about me than I do, GuardSquealer. It seems I've been happy. Am I waiting for it to happen again? No.

Could this have been a one time thing? Yes.

Human nature may not be what you judge it to be. Perhaps time will show you that things are not what they seem when you are younger. Perhaps someone will reveal something surprising to you, or something inside yourself will surprise you. One of the truly wonderful things in life is that it is not predictable. Things do not always fit neatly into boxes, or have the order we believe. Sometimes, there is beauty and surprise and joy, where we least expect it.

It is what it is. Homosexual activity. I don't have a problem with someone doing whatever they want to do and what makes them feel good. I just noticed a lot of postings stating they weren't gay, but they were doing these types of things and were looking forward to trying to do them again. Ok so they are not gay. What are they? Well they are not heterosexual. I really don't even care what they are, they are the ones stating they are not gay. Well I am heterosexual, never have done anything to another male, and I can assure that a million years can go by, and I will never have any homosexual activity. So they must not be heterosexual. Once again I am not necessarily trying to label. Just bringing up a point. If you experimented one time and aren't excited about trying it again, then yea who cares. But if you are sitting around waiting for your next chance then don't say your not gay. Just don't say anything.

And it sounds sweet that you found beauty, surprise and joy in the activities you participated in with another man, like I said I am glad for you. However I cannot imagine that I would ever find the same things doing those things. I know that I am a kind, caring and compassionate human being and I am not judgemental in anyway. But like I said I just thought I would point out the obvious. \

In the whole scheme of things this is so insignificant and unimportant that under normal circumstances I would never even take the time to comment. But since I have some free time, I just pass the time by commenting when I feel compelled to do so. I don't think I have been over offensive by my postings. Perhaps I have made some feel uncomfortable, but I have never meant to hurt anyones feelings. I guess when I read this in the man to man board, I found it to be in the wrong area. And thought I would point that out.

Without offending anyone do you feel that someone is less manly for participating in these types of activities?

I just ran across this site tonight and really enjoyed reading the postings--especially the discussions between GuardSquealer and tftoben. GuardSquealer is right, that by definition, any sexual act between two or more men, whether it be a circle jerk, bJ or whatever is "gay or homosexual activity". I am surprised that nobody mentioned the Kinsey scale, ranking people's sexuality on a progressive scale from zero (completely heterosexual) through six (completely homosexual). Most people are somewhat bisexual--in the 1 to 5 range. It's been awhile since I read the Kinsy report, but as I understand it, there are a combination of ways one begins to assign a number to his sexuality. One of the key factors is preference--not necessarily the number of sexual encounters with either sex. One man may have had sex with 10 men and only one woman and might define himself as a 1 on the Kinsy scale because he strongly prefered the experience with the woman. He's clearly not a zero, cause he has some interest in men--but he's not a 6 either. Also, one's sexual identity (number ranking on the Kinsy scale) often (if not usually) changes during a person's life. I was married for 18 years and would have considered myself about a 3.5 or 4 in the early years. Now I'm about a 5.9. Homosexual activity does not mean someone is a homosexual--because that may not be his preference. He may define himself as primarily heterosexual--a 1 on the Kinsy scale--but if he has had any kind of sex with a man he has had a homosexual/gay experience. Technically someone could have had sex exclusively with women and all the time be longing to have sex with men, strongly preferring men in his fantasies, but (for whatever reason) never acting on his preference. He's probably at least a 5 on the Kinsey scale--cause that's what he'd prefer even if he's never acted on his desires.

My theory is that God created everyone and everything in this universe. We are all uniquely different and similar in so many ways. But one thing boggles my mind is that how senseless this topic is. We are human beings placed on this earth for the expansion of our knowledge or our world and minds. There is no such thing as "normal" no one is completely 100% gay or str8, good or bad. Human beings just like the rest of the animal kingdom are sexual beings, they do what feels good and if you want to pro-create then you have sex with the opposite sex its as simple as that. I am man and know i'm str8 yet i am confident enough with my sexuality to have a company of another guy without having to put a label on it. Its all part of out nature to explore our mind, body and soul. My point is no one is really wrong when it comes to this, god doesn't care. Live life and have fun, be compassionate, those are things "God" cares about. The rest is just what it is and its how we evolve.

Nicely put, showbizboy. And GuardSquealer, I am really glad you wrote. You sound thoughtful, and there was a lot of insight in what you said. I don't feel like I'm any less of a man, but I do feel slightly more human, more vulnerable, less quick to label because of it...like other people might think I am less, but I don't feel any less myself.

tobin, I went back through and reread your posts. Is there a chance that you regret the path you took with your sexuality? It sounds as if you appreciate your wife, but you might be longing for something that could have been. And I can't imagine spending a lifetime wishing for something else. I hope you find satisfaction and happiness in your life. Best Wishes.

She more than satisfies me in bed, in conversation, in companionship, in every way possible. We've been together since we were 13. I would not want to live a minute without her. We've just celebrated our 36th anniversary. You have all my best wishes, too.

GuardSquealer, you've given me a lot of food for thought.

I never had sex with other boys growing up, because back in the Dark Ages, I thought it would turn me gay, and I never ever wanted to be gay. During the teen years when it is rampant to experiment, I would not. We are talking the sixties, when free love was everywhere, anything went, and the diseases were gentle, like gonorrhea. Nobody had heard of herpes, or HIV, or chlamydia. I think there is a part of me that would like a taste of something strange once in a blue moon, and gay might be a part of that. I used to fantasize about being one of an mmf configuration, where the two males were driving the female to the highest ecstasy.

The guy I had sex with was someone I would cross the street to get away from, before and after. Still, we were both hot for it that time, and thoroughly enjoyed it. It's a fond memory, even if he is not, like an ex girlfriend you couldn't stand, who was really good in bed. The strangeness, and danger, added to the excitement, for both of us.

I still am extremely oriented towards women's breasts, as I have been since birth. When I see a pair, something inside me goes on like a light. I don't actually want to have sex with her, but there is a moment. I'm sure you know what I mean. A fine, round ass does the same thing. If you detect a gay longing in me, and you might, it is like watching a fine pair go by. I don't really want it, I know it would destroy the loving, tender relationship which means everything to me, but there is still some little part of me that registers some pleasure.

I watched two uncles who were also one woman men, have their lifetime mates die, and not be fortunate enough to die of a broken heart. I also watched my father in law, who was the same way, live for nine days after his wife died. If I am lucky, I will die of a broken heart, the minute she passes. If I am as unfortunate as my uncles were, I would not date, neither female nor male.

So I guess the answer to your question, is that straight men come in a lot of variations, like any other group of people. You are closer to 100% straight. I might be a different mix, but still come squarely on the side of straight. Many men who self identify as straight, but have a little bi leaning, can still be straight, and have occasional sex with another guy. They are going to gravitate back to a woman. They might get sick at the thought of kissing a guy, or having a relationship with one that lasts more than a few minutes. Lots of room for variation in the great human pageant.

tobin, I appreciate your honesty, even though I don't believe I am owed it. I spend a lot of time reading these posts because at my work it is one of the few websites we can access and there is a lot of time when there is nothing else to do. When I came across this post I noticed there were several people that posted about encounters with other men. And they emphasize how straight they are yet they look forward to doing it again, and ask others details about their adventures.

I know that I am heterosexual and find no sexual attraction to other men. I am not affraid to say another man might be good looking, or interesting. And I am comfortable being friends with other men. Hanging out, doing activities, guy stuff. Building things, working on cars, motorcycles whatever. Yet I have never had the desire to have sexual relations with any of them. I am not saying that is wrong, just that I don't think it is reasonable to say that someone is completely straight if they do have such desires.

And no it doesn't really matter what they are labeled. I really probably was just being a bit of an antagonist when I originally posted just to get things a little more interesting. Like I have said in the past in the whole scheme of things I realize that this is insignificant. There is so many more important things in the world. I have learned a lot from reading posts on here, and from giving and receiving input to posts.

I do understand what you are saying. And I have similar feelings about sexual relations I wish might have happened also. I too am married to a wonderful woman who completely satisfies me. But I often think of my first wife and wonder what might have been. For a long time I frequented the gentlemens clubs and think about several of the dancers that stood out and I still fondly remember details about them, like how there hair smelled. And certainly their wonderfully fake breasts.

So thank you for your thoughtful replies and I certainly hope I didn't offend you in any way. Sounds like you are a well rounded, stable individual and probably one of the most normal ones that post on here. I guess I did what I originally was trying to do, in getting things going a little. Thanks

anytime, my friend. thanks for the kind words.

An older friend introduced me to it when i was in my teens..we just look at magazines..since dvd's weren't availble yet..want time i brought my best friend and we had a circle jerk, but my best friend was too shy to do it again.I always thought it was very healthy and am looking to try it again..if I could find guys near me in South Florida

I'm in the same situation, one partner but interested in something like this.

I've done one and had a good time. I would do it again. Five guys standing around and jerking. Felt good. It's also good to know that there are others out there who enjoy it as well.

I just posed comments about defining sexual identity--replying to May 26. Anyone interested may want to scroll up to that date.

"Artsistmusician" I am familiar with the kinsey scale and youre right that this fact should have been brought up in this discussion and infact is a good tool to use in male/female sexuality. I think as a society we have forgotten this concept since we do not like the "gray" because it cannot be clearly defined. Instead we like to place people in different classifications to make sense of a given situation.

So for those who are not familia with the Kinsey scale you should look it up it is very interesting.

So many people refer to Kinsey and few study it well enough to know it was a very small sample in a very controlled setting. Personally I think the conclusions are valid but the research was decidedly manipulated. It's always a good idea to go beyond the results of any study to look at the process and procedure.

I think that the studies following Kinsey that involved much larger groups and wider ranges are more interesting. What every study that I know of shows is that there is a huge spectrum of sexual expression that is more socially and environmentally determined than most people accept. Studies trying to prove the opposite simply do not pan out. They depend on moral absolutes and pre-determined outcomes than reality.

Sexuality is more what we choose than what we are.

Well if I could find one in my area I would for sure participate.

I would participate too. I used to do them more often when i was younger. In my begining stages of masturbation there was usually at least one other guy there

I would love to be in a circle jerkoff. It sounds really exciting and a big turn on! I never have the opportunity or know how to get involved.

We are 3 couples that do a lot of thing togeather, camping, card playing (strip poker) going to nudies camp etc etc. One night afeter playing For the last hand the girls said that who ever lost had to do a circle jerk. We lose and we started with a jerk and it turned into a bj. The girls loved it and we still do it. (yhe girls loose also)

I have done a lot of things with my male friends. But no way would I give them a BJ. The women we have always been with would never watch us have sex > The would also require to receive and give sex with us.

Now thats exciting Oliver! I guess i have had situations like that come about as well, but not with the wives around.

I do it often at the gym after a hard workout in the steamroom or sauna. You can always find some other guys in their jerking off, and great way to get your rocks off. Sometimes someone will jerk you off, but mostly we do our own jerking. Gotta remember to clean up though....can be alot of cum all over.

Yea, my gym has guys that will JO in the sauna. I've found a lot of guys will want to grab hold and JO for me or even take a shot at oral. That's a bit too much for me, especially in the gym.

That's pretty common in most gym's saunas & showers. To each thier own I guess.

I meant to add, I agree with previous post - some things are best suited for more private settings.

I think that's the big turn on about sauna/steamrooms is the thought of getting "caught" and it is a safer environment for those who are not wanting intimacy, just the ability to get your rocks off and move on. You go in, unload and shower. No strings......

OK then. Point made. Like I said to each his own.

I don't know if I believe all of the people that say they see guys jacking off at the gym. Are they gay gyms? What type of people do that?

No it's not a gay gym, allthogh a small per centage is gay. It's Mostly straight. Just alot of guys who are "curious".

The gyms I've been to are co-ed and have a mixture of straight and gay guys like most any other gym I think, but the showers and sauna are a congregation area for guys who want to see and be seen, jo themselves or each other. It sometimes goes as far as oral and rimming. Like other posters have said, the thrill of doing this in a public setting is what gets them off.

I still can't see this happening! Don't other guys get upset and turn them in?

In my experience growing up and into early adulthood, guys have not cared. And if they havent seen it done before they will either join in or hang out and watch or just glance around and excuse themselves. But not really be upset by the situation.

Hey gp12,

Just noticed your post from 9-15-09. I'm old school, so was wondering what term "rimming" means, could you enlighten me? Thanks!

so does this mean it would be ok if a guy was to do it to you in private ,

I have never seen this in my gym you rarely see a naked body we have a changing room and little rooms before that, about the only ones you see naked are the ones changing from swimming. have never had a circle and don't know if i would welcome the come on ,not to say i have never had another mans hand to entice me but that was long ago when we were young and daring

I am curious regarding the sauna, steamroom stories. I've been in quite a few and haven't seen that type of activity. One time (many years ago) I was in a jacuzzi in my bikini and a guy was eyeing me(this was a co-ed), afterwards I was in the locker room,then the sauna, there was a few other guys,The jacuzzi guy and I chatted, I did get a erection(did put the knees up as not to draw attention to myself) He may have noticed, but didn't say anything since there were other guys . Showered, dressed ,went home. Nothing happened. The guy was moving the next day, so never saw him again. Silverdad

Yeah, you have to be careful. I was in a situation where this guy and I were jerking off in the Sauna and this other guy came in. We covered up and acted like we were just talking. He said it was ok for us to continue what we were doing, so I guess he could see our erections under the towel. I was kind of afraid to do it wondering if he was setting us up, but my buddy whipped his out and started jacking off, and this guy just watched. Then he asked me to jack my buddy off which i did and he waited until my buddy shot his load and then left. He never touched himself while he watched us. Kind of amazing since he is very masculine and his wife works out in the gym too. Guess he liked watching but not participating.

leep12- I think at the gym's guys are just overall curious about eachother. Makes it fun and interesting.

19pgh77-- I AGREE.

Hey I'm new here and I have never been part of a circle jerk nor I have I seen any of the man on man action you mentioned.

otter, rimming is when you lick/stick your tongue in another's ass.

I have never been involved in one, but then I've never had friends close enough for that sort of thing. I would however like to give it a try.

you can understand what a rimming feels like solo. take a bath. get out of the tub very slowiy. the water will lap you, at some point. it feels amazingly like a human tongue.

I never was in circle jerk with my buddies when I was growing up. After getting married, my brother-in-laws and I jerked together on camping trips but never touched each other.

My three oldest sons have told me they have jacked together and at two of them have shared with me that they have been in circle jerks with their friends.

I can't imagine what you have done in bringing up those boys, to make them trust you so much with such private information. It is so unusual, I don't think I have ever heard of it before. You must have proven yourself to be worthy of this high level, over and over, for each of them to feel that open. What did you do?

tftobin, I feel very fortunate that my sons are all very open with me. I am not all that sure what I did right, but I have an idea. First, I have never lied when they asked me personal questions. Sometimes when they were young and I felt it was inappropriate to talk about something over their heads, my response may have been that is something that we will talk about when you are a teenager, not right now. If they were at what I deemed the right age for a real answer, I gave them one. I was very open with each one of them when I had the "Birds and Bess" discussion. I know a lot of dads are embarrassed to talk about sex with their sons but I looked at it like my obligation and I did what was right to do. At that time I let them know I was always available and they could ask or tell me anything. I let them know I would give them my best advice but I trusted that they would make the right decisions for themselves. When they got to an age where I thought they might be sexually active, I asked. I let them know they had to take responsibility for their actions and it was essesntial to use condoms. I offered to buy them if they wanted me to. Two of them took me up on it. I also think the fact that I never hid my own body from my sons as they were growing up made them comfortable not hiding theirs. We are all comfortable being nude together whether it is at the gym, a nude beach, or swimming in a secluded stream while on a camping trip. My boys respect me as a father for everything I do for them but also seem to trust me like a friend because I treat them with a great deal of respect. I never baby talked to them when they were babies and I have never talked down to them at any age. We have very real conversations. I spend quality time every week with each of them and most of the time it is something they have invited me to participate in. I do think I have done a number of things "right" to earn the trust they give me but I never fail to count my lucky stars that I have such an extraordinary relationship with them.

so do you also have a really good relationship with your brother in laws? because i have 2 brother in laws and i cant really figure out how to relate to them or talk to them. we have no common interests or anything. are they much younger or older than you? thanks

calvin,

Yes I have great relationships with both of my wife's brothers. One is 5 years younger than me and the other is 8 years tounger. My wife and I got married very young so they were still young kids when I became part of their family. I think they sort of idolized me back then. My wife and I moved away and eventually both of them have moved to the same area. They came at different times and each lived with us about 6 months while looking for work, a place to live, etc. During that time I really got to know them and by then they were adults and I enjoyed their company.

Now they are both married and have kids of their own. Our families all get together for holidays and a few other times a year. The younger one is a member at the same gym I belong to so we see each other there a couple times a week, too.

I can't say I have alot in common with them but we still enjoy spending time together when we can.

you are a lucky man greg. seriously, i think a lot of guys would be envious of your life. from as much as i know, i am. in my situation i am the youngest of my 2 brother in laws, and soon to be third. which kind of makes me the loner. so it's a little tough to have a good relationship with them. i dont think we would ever be close enough to actually circle jerk like you did with your brother in laws. which is too bad...it would be great bonding.

thanks for your response

I have been in many circle jerks with men of all ages, young, middle aged and older men all together having a mutual sexual experience. For me it is a very exhilarating experience seeing all the men jerking off together. It raises the sexual excitement much higher than when doing it solo! I would love to belong to a club or group on a regular weekly basis.

by that definition, probably 95% of men are gay.

would love to be apart of one. it is a secret fantasy, not sure if i could ever go through with it. but it definitely would be hot. any groups in orange county ca?